We moms do crazy big things every day and we don’t give ourselves enough credit for it. And motherhood may be the most challenging thing for many of us, but it can also be the most refining experience. Because it brings out a lot about ourselves: our fears, things we value, subconscious traits, habits, and more. So a lot of the work in motherhood requires internal reflection.
The Real Work of Motherhood
Our children are like mirrors. They often reflect how we show up to the world as we impart pieces of us into their being. And oftentimes, the behavior we see in our children comes from the relationship we create with them. So the next time one of our kids yell at the slightest inconvenience, let’s ask ourselves, where did they learn to react that way to problems? (Do I yell at the slightest inconvenience too?) Do they have an underlying need that I haven’t met, like communication? and so on. When our kids trigger us, we often think of what’s wrong with our children. But if we unpack more of motherhood, we will realize that it’s a lot more about our parenting. (Check out 3 steps to creating peace.)
So setting a good example, changing oneself for the better, teaching our kids the lessons we’ve learned from our mistakes, etc, are important. Yes, even more important than the household chores.
And don’t beat yourself up if you think you’re not being a good parent! As moms, we are still learning, and we will certainly make mistakes. It is a matter of how much are we willing to improve our parenting and relationship with our kids. Because in that way, we also teach our kids that making mistakes is okay. That they can be repaired, as long as we own up to it and take responsibility for correcting it.
Join me, and Sonnet & Veronica of Not Your Mother’s podcast for more motherhood hacks! This is my first duel episode and I’m so excited!
Other life-changing lessons you will learn in this episode…
- How to tone down mom anger
- How to talk so kids will listen
- Why reflective parenting is effective
- Unpacking the underlying issues in our child’s behavior
- Learning to apologize to kids
“Connect before you correct with your child.” – Sonnet and Veronica
It is important to know, communicate, and acknowledge each other’s needs so we could have an understanding relationship with our children. Meeting the needs of our children does not equate to spoiling them. Remember that it’s is a fluid, valuable connection between two people and not competition.
Meet Sonnet and Veronica
Sonnet Simmons and Veronica Frieling are hosts of the “Not Your Mother’s Podcast.” And co-creators of the parenting online course “Raising Children You Like” with Bryana Kappa. They are two long-time friends, who became new moms at the same time. They kept asking the question “Why doesn’t anyone tell you this about motherhood?” And so they set out on a journey to find answers to the unsaid and unspoken in motherhood by interviewing experts in areas like; sex after baby, female body, postpartum, marriage, childhood development and so much more. Sonnet is also singer and songwriter and Veronica is a Digital marketing queen.