I haven’t always thought self care was necessary. In fact, I even stated that it was a luxury. Boy was I wrong. taking care of my mom self was nothing short of a necessity.
Me as a 1st time mom:
“I got this. It’s a little wild. I’m tired. At times, I’m hallucinating because of the lack of sleep. But I can cloth diaper, make meals from scratch, find time for myself, meet up with friends at the park, and long strolls with the hubs & dogs.”
Me as a 2nd time mom:
“Ok….so maybe I won’t cloth diaper when we go out, only at home. Babywearing is now a mandatory, necessity, praise the lord for ergo & moby. I can find someone to watch the baby so I can volunteer in my toddler’s preschool, and from time to time, I can relax.”
Me as a 3rd time mom:
“Cloth diaper what? Mom time, huh? Date nights? what are those? I’m literally going to go crazy if I don’t eat….I haven’t eaten more than a handful of goldfish in the last 6 hours. And really, the recommendation is only 2 hours MAX of screen time?”
You feel me??
It was in the first 6 months after having my first baby, that I knew something had to shift. I wasn’t taking any time for myself, because in the season I was in, it just wasn’t easy.
When I had my first baby, I went for long walks with friends along the beach. They were sooo restorative. But when we both had 2 babies, we couldn’t really push 2 double wide strollers down the road together, not to mention getting all 4 kids to cooperate.
And by the time I had my 3rd baby, I was in the throws of now managing school drop offs and Girl Scouts, soccer, and gymnastics. But at the end of the day (and all the moments in between) I was tired & exhausted.
Then mom had a meltdown
I had a mom breakdown. I was over extended, depleted, and emotionally just over it. And the worst part of it, I couldn’t be the mom or wife I wanted to be because my temper was short & my patience was thin. I just wanted to feel excited about being a mom again. It started to feel like a chore. The days of playing with my kids were now traded with just an endless list of things that needed to be done. Are you feeling the same way I was?
Fitting in some mom time
You have to find something that fills your cup. I know as moms we think it’s selfish if we take time for ourselves. We’re so used to having to put others needs before our own. We feed the kids before we eat. Even showering alone can sometimes be a chore. So even just a little time to yourself can make major gains in your mama fuel cup.
For me, there were a few things that made the WORLD of difference…
- Taking care of my body. Nutrition & exercise were KEY in my energy, strength, confidence, endorphins and so much more. If you’re interested in what I did & having support with it too…click here.
- Investing in my mindset, celebrating my wins & all I was grateful for. I’ve since read more books than in the 5 years prior. See my 12 Must Reads here and I’ve spent way more time in prayer. You can check out my 21 Days of Prayer for the Overwhelmed Mom.
- Finding a community of others that could meet me where I was and encourage me to live beyond just mom. They encouraged me to dream & pursue passions. Seriously, mama, when you are lit up about what you do…that translates into how you are as a mom and a spouse. Others see it.